Essential Pregnancy Q&A
Posted by Kassi42 11 years ago
 
Q: Should I have a baby after 35?  
A: No, 35 children is enough.  
 
Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?  
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.  
 
Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?  
A: Childbirth.  
 
Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?  
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.  
 
Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?  
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.  
 
Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?  
A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.  
 
Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?  
A: Yes, pregnancy.  
 
Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?  
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.  
 
Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?  
A: When the kids are in college.