Once upon a time, there was a SPC Schwarz stationed with the Army in the Balkans. SPC Schwarz was either very clever or very bored; but probably both, since he managed to attempt or be warned about 213 things he wasn't allowed to do. He collected those things into a hillarious list and posted them to the web. The site hadn't been updated in a couple of years and has since gone away; but the list is classic, so I saved it.  
 
A couple favorites:  
2. My proper military title is 'Specialist Schwarz' not 'Princess Anastasia'.  
103. My commander is not old enough to have fought in the civil war, and I should stop implying that he did.  
191. Our Humvees cannot be assembled into a giant battle-robot.
 
 
Don't read this while consuming liquids near your computer
Heh
Jetlabels: I nominate 'Skippy' for platoon leader!
Hey
beaglebot: Who got hold of my service record?